Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Replacement Therapy

Today I read a blog about replacing negative thoughts and reactions with positive ones to create new habits. This is something I'm excited to try with my son.

Since his tongue-tie surgery, his speech has not improved at all. If anything, it's gotten worse because he's developed a floppy tongue, so his enunciation is so unclear most times that I'm unable to understand him. This causes a chain reaction, where I frustratingly say, "I don't understand you. Please speak more clearly," when I know he can't. Instead of saying negative things that cause him to shut down, I'm going to try new tactics. (I need to research some lessons to do at home.)

I've put in three calls to see how to get speech therapy started, because as soon as he's able to use his new tongue, he'll have an easier time communicating, which will make our daily lives so much easier.
I am not expecting miracles; from what I've read, his speech may never improve. But since he's only 3, I think odds are in his favor, with some articulation lessons, that he'll catch up. In the meantime I'm having a difficult time wrapping my brain around knowing how hard it must be for him. My poor baby boy.

Monday, November 21, 2011

Scary Monsters at Bedtime

My son, who was a great sleeper up until about a year ago, has suddenly started talking about being scared of "monsters" and doesn't want to go to bed. So I did what every mom does when she's stuck: I Googled. Here's what I found.

Q. My 3-year-old is terrified of the "monsters" under his bed  -- it's gotten to the point where he wakes up screaming a couple nights a week. It's exhausting for everyone in the house, and I feel terrible for my child. What can I do to help him get over this fear? Does he need to see a child psychologist?

The short answer, moms, is: Your kid is alright. My Moon Boy is at the age where his imagination has started to develop and everything can be scary... cartoons, shadows on the wall, loud noises, too much excitement.  In public restrooms, he is afraid of automatic flushing toilets and often runs screaming. (Even though it's an extremely funny sight, I never let him see me smiling.) Even with an obsessive amount of night lights, he still claims to be scared at night, so I'm trying new tactics tonight.

Some points in the article stood out to me:
  • Don't dismiss his fears by saying "You're not scared" or "There's nothing to be scared of." Don't tell him "Big boys don't get scared." Instead, explain monsters are only on TV and aren't real.
  • Encourage him to draw or describe the 'monster' and try to find the trigger.
  • Don't chase the monster away by looking under the bed. It will only draw out his fear.
  • You shouldn't blame yourself for your child's fear  -- it's not your fault. Nor do his bad dreams reflect an underlying emotional or psychological problem.

You can read the article here:

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Barbie Got Tattooed.

Barbie's been stirring it up again, but this time the controversy has nothing to do with her blonde ambition or bizarre body proportions.
Nope, this Barbie conjures more P!nk (the singer) than Paris (Hilton), with pink hair, leopard leggings, plenty of tattoos and a dog named "Bastardo".  Created in collaboration with the Japanese-inspired Italian designer tokidoki, it's similar to Barbies designed by Kate Spade and Bob Mackie as part of Mattel's collectors edition.
On its website, Mattel says the doll is "for the adult collector" and that it's sold out. But tokidoki Barbie's inked up skin still has people talking.
Some, like this commentor on a Christian Science Monitor story, are questioning whether the doll's tatts are appropriate for young kids.
Barbies are for children not adults [and] they should not be dressed like they are teenagers or adults.  Tattoos are tacky and should not be exposed to kids.
 Over on a Huffington Post story, a comment from Loretta Schrader says:
  Grrrrreeeeeeeat now kids in grade school and younger will be bugging their parents for tattoos and their parents will oblige .
Still, numerous others think the new Barbie is simply a sign of the times, and tattoo-sporting Moms are applauding that it's about time there's a Barbie that looks like them.
Nicolepierre, a poster on's The Stir, writes:
As a tattooed mom who got pierced and dyed her hair blue to celebrate the birth of my twins (albeit 14 years ago) I so totally want this doll!"
 And as poster, Cait, commented on
This Barbie is great, it shows not to judge and that regardless of what someone chooses to do with their skin, they are beautiful!! I am so tired of people without tattoos thinking they are better then someone who does have them. Get over yourself! All of my tattoos have a very deep and personal meaning and I will never regret them.
Adds commentor Sabrinambowen on
Sorry, but seeing how there are LOTS of children out there whose parents have tattoos, I'm not sure why Barbie (who is supposed to be an adult) having them is an issue... As a tattoed parent, I think it's awesome!
Parents, what's your take on tokidoki Barbie? And if you're a mom or dad with tattoos, how do you talk to your kids about tattoos in general?

Kavita Varma-White is a writer, editor and mom of two tweens. In between cheering at numerous soccer and baseball games, she's a contributing editor for TODAY Moms and

"Not a good fit."

Not surprisingly, after four short days at the exciting new job, I was deemed "not a good fit for us." It goes along quite well with my motto in life, haha. Always have liked to do my own thing. ;)

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